No Laughing Matter

If you were looking for any jokes about penile frostbite, you're humping up the wrong tree. I would never make any smart-alecy remarks about something so serious. Okay, I suppose it may be a little bit funny when someone else suffers from it (like the time Prince Harry got it). But it's not funny at all when it happens to you. 

Having experienced a couple of seemingly serious such incidents, you would think that I'd know better. Today, it was 20F with a feel-like reading of 8F. I thought I was dressed appropriately enough: my fancy tights with one layer underneath - the old insulated undies. But that wind was wicked. As I started running with the wind at my back, I didn't feel too bad. It was only when I turned around that I felt it.

And 'it' got colder and colder. And colder and colder. I stopped at a convenient porta-john, and I think the warm pee passing through may have helped. For a while. Then everything got cold again. Eventually, and not a moment too soon, I arrived home for a mid-run break.

What to do now? At this point, I was six miles into a planned ten-mile run, I sure wanted to do more. But it certainly wasn't going to happen in my current state of inadequate malfunctioning wardrobe. By the time I could change, I would certainly be able to talk myself out of any further running. But then it occurred to me: stuff a rag down there!

Our rag pile is conveniently located by the garage door, so I grabbed a cut piece of towel and stuffed away.

Guess what? It worked. I completed the run without further incident. So don't worry about me; I'm fine. Maybe I'll even get smarter. Nah.

2023 Buckeye Woods 25K Race Report

Thirteen years ago, some friends and I scouted out a five-mile course through Buckeye Woods Park in rural Medina County. The purpose was to hold a new free, fat-ass after-Thanksgiving ultramarathon run. Participants would run six such loops plus one more mile to make it to 50K, or cut that in half for 25K. Runners could also just show up and run as much or as little as they wanted.

And run they did. Folks came from all over to join the fun. Although there was no fee, we made them join the Medina County Road Runners in order to be official. The race was small and informal enough that I was able to act as Race Director yet also participate in the run. Eventually, I was able to hand those awesome RD duties off to others, but I've still (mostly) continued to run.

The race has continued to prosper, although there have been up and down years. I've managed to complete the 50K ten times (including the one Summer edition). Other times, I ran somewhat less than 50K, but once (and I'll never live this one down) missed the race entirely because I was traveling.

This year, 2023, I'm back in the saddle. Mostly. A year ago, I declared that I was done with ultramarathons. With that pledge in mind, I'm only going to run 25K today. Should be easy, right?

We start with a pretty good group; more runners than I thought there would be. After the initial mile, I run the first five-mile loop mostly with Julie Boggs. She's planning to run the entire 50K; she's not a wimp like me. I run the second loop mostly with Shannon Barnes and Katherine Kinsey. I can tell you that I am hurtin' for certain by the time we approach the finish line. Our time is 2:39 - around ten minutes per mile. 

I'm happy to say that we stayed mostly together and that we kept it at a fairly steady pace. But this 25K felt like the old 50K runs used to. After hanging around a little, I decided to jog a couple more - mostly so that I could call it a long run. Some of that was with Julie, who had been starting her second half. I was happy when that part of the run was finished as well!

2023 Medina Turkey Chase Race Report

I definitely need to do more of these shorter races. The mile splits tell the story: 7:43, 7:55, 8:23, 9:00. Yeah, the first two miles are down and the last two are up. I knew that. But still... That totals up to 33:07. That's about 45 seconds slower than last year, and I didn't get a pie (for the first 50 gobblers) even then. 

That's all the bad news. Here's the good news. It was a blast: Seeing all my new and old friends, and everyone enjoying the fun event at the Square. That's what it's all about.

All I need to do to make everything perfect is to run faster.

Running in Scotland and Ireland

Our first four nights were in Edinburgh, Scotland. Edinburgh seemed like a nice place to run, with many parks and quiet, public areas. I, however, spent most of my running time just exploring, and you know how I get when in exploration mode: very, very slow.

I did indeed manage to explore the city quite a bit during my two runs there.

Another cool thing that I encountered in Scotland: the beach in St. Andrews where Chariots of Fire was filmed. Too bad I wasn't able to run at the time we were there.

Chariots of Fire Beach

Once we got to Dublin, Ireland, I did manage to get a good run in. I ran along the River Liffey for two and a half miles, then along the trail through Phoenix Park for another two and a half miles. By the time I turned around to head back, it was already getting light, and I had to hurry. I did, and it was a pretty good double-digit run. Exploration mode is fine, but I like to get somewhere as well. It helps when you don't need to worry about getting lost or about (very much) traffic.

Walking along the River Liffey later on

Galway was unrunnable, as storm Debi hit with furious wind and rain. 

In Derry, I found a place to run... along a river (this time, the Foyle) once again. Does this surprise you? It took some doing to find the trail, and I found myself in mud at times (even though the trail was mostly paved), but it was, all in all, good running. That went for both an afternoon and a morning run.

As unexpected as that afternoon run in Derry was, it was even more surprising to get a couple of runs in at the Giant's Causeway near Belfast. We were there with the group, but when it rained, Debbie went (and stayed) back at the visitor's center. I then got some running - up and down the trail leading to the formations. It was pretty cool (and windy, and rainy).

Trail to the Giant's Causeway

My first run around Belfast was cool. Literally - it's the wind, not, so much, the cold. At least there was no rain today. Once again, I had a river to navigate by, the River Lagan.  It all worked okay, but Belfast isn't the greatest place to run. For my second run there, I pushed the pace a little, got ten miles in, and had the best run of the trip. (That;s not saying all that much).

For more about this trip, check out my travel blog post.

Alone Again, Naturally

Friday morning: It's time to run long on Lester, once again. Things go quite swimmingly, until they don't. You see, they left me all alone. I could be singing the song, Alone Again, Naturally, because I sure felt alone and lonely. You would think I would slow down as I often do when I'm left alone to my own devices. But I had taken a gel and I felt like I was still moving fairly well. Unfortunately, my Garmin begs to differ. I am indeed slowing down. But after having company for those first 14, I can handle 4 more. I can, and I do.

But it wasn't pretty. I averaged 10:29 for those 18 miles, about par for the course for me. But had I maintained that faster pace I did with my friends, my overall average would have been much better.

Sunday morning: 18 miles twice in three days? I did it this way before two weeks ago. And now I'm at it again. This time it's at Hinckley. Many are aware of the vertical challenge the Hinckley 9-mile loop presents. Today, I'm doing it twice, just like I did three weeks ago. And just like then, I've got company. Company for the entire run. Said companionship helps tremendously today.

I actually manage to run the second loop faster than the first. Last time, they were nearly the same. Finishing strong down those last hills really feels good. I'm not even very sore.

Here's to hoping that I can keep improving from here.

You guys rock!

She did it! My friend, Jenny Hoffman made it: a new World Record for running across the United States in 47 days. I couldn’t be more proud, and I feel honored to have had the opportunity to play a (very) small part in it by joining her for part of her run through Ohio. Jenny’s run was all the more astounding because she tried and failed to get across in the past. Persistence pays off.

It occurs to me that until this point, I have never written very much about some of my other friends and their recent running accomplishments. These are people I trained with several times a week throughout the spring, summer, and fall of 2023. That makes them closer than most close friends. As it happens, each of them did exceedingly well in their late summer and early fall goal running events. Not that I ever had any doubts. Here are just a few of the great achievements. I will try to do this without mentioning their actual names, just to protect their privacy. Sorry if I left anyone out.

Two of them trained together nearly all the time. It helped that they were married to one another. They traveled the farthest for their goal race: the Crater Lake Marathon in Oregon. This was the most arduous event because of the overall elevation as well as the elevation gain and loss over the course. Finishing was quite an achievement, and surely a memorable one.

Three ran the Akron Marathon. For one, it was a comeback race after a major injury. For another, it was a very first marathon (a very good one!), and for the third, it was a personal best. All this during a slightly warm day on a challenging course.

One, after pacing many other events, ran one just for himself: The Columbus Marathon. As expected (by me), he ran a super time which was also a personal best.

And that’s not all. Some of my other friends that I don’t see quite so often also did some fabulous stuff. One person managed to qualify for Boston in Dayton, and another completed a Double Marathon at Run with Scissors. Besides all of us normal people, some trail ultrarunning friends are so far beyond what I can comprehend, that I hesitate to even mention them. So I won’t, other than to say, ‘All you guys rock!’

How did we all do so well? There’s little doubt that it helped to work together. Teamwork and camaraderie are nearly unbeatable. It’s all pretty amazing. I don’t know what will happen next for our tribe, but I can’t wait to find out.